Boys will be Boys

I feel bad for my little guy lately. Anyone who has both boys and girls is aware of the vast difference between raising boys and girls. To give you an idea, as soon as Gavin could stand, he could body slam, and he did on a regular basis (laughing hysterically the whole time btw).

Gavin tries very hard to be good, at least most of the time, but sadly, his little boy nature is at odds with what is considered “good” behavior at school. He’s about to turn seven this weekend, and anyone who has spent time with boys this age knows that burping and potty humor are enough to set a little guy into a fit of uncontrollable giggles. Sitting still for a little guy is tantamount to torture and sword fights with pencils and spontaneous “gun fights” (using your finger as the gun) are the norm of the day for a first grade boy. Yet, all those things are also not acceptable or are considered not pc in an elementary classroom.       

Anyone who has taught in an elementary classroom will tell you, even the best of kids start getting unruly at the end of the school year. For those who struggle to behave on a regular basis, it can be just about impossible. Gavin is a perfect example of this.

In two weeks time Gavin got in trouble for pretending his finger was a gun and “shooting” one of his friends, for choosing “It’s time to kiss the girls!” as his example sentence in the lesson about exclamation points (His teacher informed him that kissing was a bad word), for cheating on his spelling test (Sadly true. He had a “crib” sheet if a 1st grade list of words can be considered a crib sheet . . . Not quite sure how he thought he could hide it when he writes so large . . . ) and for saying “the D-word (literally, that phrase, not the actual D-word. When asked what the D-word was, he emphatically insisted he hadn’t said it, but that the D-word was dumbness). Sigh. That’s quite the list of infractions. Though I have to admit, as an ex-elementary teacher, I think his teacher needs to pick her battles. Boys will be boys after all and other than the spelling test, I really don’t see where the harm was.

When I compare this to my daughter who will be starting kindergarten in the fall, I shake my head. Arabelle will get awards for good behavior without really having to try. She will be the ideal student. She will be a favorite of her teacher.

 Dare I say, the ideal student at this age is almost always a girl? Little boys are full of spit and vinegar as the saying goes, and I have to admit that I am quite glad that Gavin is not an exception. I am proud of his “boyness.” I am glad he has energy in spades. I am glad that my little boy is all boy despite a society that likes to tell us that little boys should be more like girls.

I’m glad we have little boys to rough and tumble and bring balance to the drama that little girls bring. I’m glad for the differences.

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7 thoughts on “Boys will be Boys

  1. I enjoyed reading your blog. I am a mum of two boys so I do not get time off for good behaviour. Glad to know someone else’s kids are like mine – normal. Will surely be visiting your blog more often.

  2. I grew up with two brothers. I wouldn’t trade them for anything! Growing up with rough and tumble boys helps you to be stronger, learning that getting covered in mud can be fun. Poor Gavin, spring fever has struck him. The D-word…I’ve said that without saying the word too. I would certainly prefer that over other boys I hear actually saying the word.

  3. I am a little sad, actually. We tell little boys from the time they are in kindegarten that their behavior is bad, or needs medication. We live in a society that does not value masculine behavior and views it as a character flaw.

  4. Oh Heather…you are not alone! Athen will be 7 on May 27th and is so much like your little Gavin 🙂 I just know they would have a blast together! Athen turns everything into Mario, Halo, or Star Wars…oh, and of course, Ninja’s. He insists that he is a Jedi or Ninja on a daily basis. At least his 1st grade teacher has a much better understanding of little boys than his kindergarten teachers. Kids are kids…regardless. All kids (especially boys) this age are ADHD…! Why does society suddenly believe that kids must sit still and pay attention at all times? What happened to the normalcy of children running, wrestling, playing, etc? I think Gavin (and Athen) is totally perfect and wonderful 🙂

    1. I am so right there with you. Little boys at this age are supposed to be ADHD. It’s just being a boy! I wish we lived closer, because I agree, it sounds like our little guys would have a blast together! 🙂

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